7 years ago I was diagnosed with celiac disease. When I was first diagnosed I found myself apologizing over and over again to my friend and family. I felt like my disease was such a burden on everyone else. I was difficult to work with now. I was difficult to feed. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. When the thing is. They weren’t I was. I was struggling to find good food that would keep me full for the day. I was struggling to figure out what beauty product and skin care I could use. I was struggling to heal. But the helplessness I felt was endless. I didn’t feel in control of my life. Why me I’d asked myself over and over again (I’m a pretty dramatic person when I’m upset).
What people didn’t understand though was that I didn’t choice to be difficult. It was something that was always there and just decided to make an appearance and now we all had to adjust. Still to this day I get comments like oh just eat it, it won’t kill you. But it will. Eventually. Slowly. Oh you aren’t over that yet? Nope, I sure wish I could “get over it” like a common cold. Can you just grab a piece of that bread for me? No sorry I can’t. Righttt you can’t (said sarcastically). These kind of comments used to crush me. I’d end up sitting there feeling extremely miserable and left out. Sometimes that still happens. If sucks to go out to eat and not be able to indulge in a plate of cheese curds with the family but that’s okay. Food is just food.
I can’t even imagine what it would be like to eat normally again. I can’t imagine going out to ANY restaurant and just picking something off the menu. I see food commercial on tv and I find myself thinking (and sometimes dating) I wish I could have that. But honestly, if by some miracle one day I could eat whatever I wanted I don’t even know what I would pick. Food is just food.
People still to this day think being gluten free isn’t necessary which makes me belly laugh. Yes I understand that for some people it’s a fad or a choice but for (insert stat) it isn’t a choice. For most of us our lifestyles had to change suddenly with no desire at all. I understand that some people say “this was never a thing in my day”, I get that. And you’re right people weren’t being diagnosed “in your day”. But research has improved and people are learning what to look for. And I am so grateful for that. I was sick for 3 years. Think about doing something for 3 straight years. Now think about waking up every morning for three years in pain and not knowing why. That was me. I went to countless different doctors (actually 8) who all tried to tell me it was something else. Lactose intolerance, acid reflex, constipation (gross I know). With the research and knowledge know people are finding out when they are babies rather than when they are 45 and are used to eating the same thing every morning for breakfast.